Jake Flying High

My Monday nights are my favorite.  I cozy up in my favorite lounging clothes and curl up on the couch.  I am a slave to ABC on Mondays.  Truthfully, if The Bachelor, The Bachelorette, or Dancing With The Stars  isn’t on, I’m lost!  No better way to start off a new year then with a new season and a hunky pilot.

For those of you who aren’t familiar with Jake Pavelka, he is best known for telling Jillian about Wes’ evil ways in last season’s The Bachelorette.  He’s an adorable pilot with abs that are so hot they would melt a glacier.  Of course, ABC took the opportunity to please the female viewing audience by adding a dozen or so gratuitous shots; I think the one in the shower was the most provocative.   Now, if only the creative team at ABC would stop with the “Top Gun Theme,” then I’d be a happy girl!  When asked by Chris Harrison, the show’s host, if he would give up flying for love Jake replied, “Love is more powerful than flying.”   Now, that’s a hopeless romantic! 

Jillian & Ed visited the mansion to interview the ladies and give Jake their opinions.  They looked like they were still very much in love and a really happy couple.  So, here’s a little juice… apparently one of the remaining 15 ladies has an affair with a producer of the show and is kicked off.

Here are this season’s bachelorettes:

Alexa: The Harley-Driving-Plane-Flying Gal

Her intro video was all about her sharing common interests with Jake.  She showed up out of the limo wearing her motorcycle gloves.  OUTCOME:  Sent packing.

Ali is a 25-year old advertising gal and is seemingly as nice as she is pretty.  She has just a fresh, unique demeanor.  She tore her yellow gown while walking with Jake.  She claims that she won’t have the dress repaired in memory of tonight’s show.  OUTCOME:  She’s staying.

Ashleigh has amazing legs!  So much so that she was wearing the most alluring dress as she stepped out of the limousine.  The long gown had a slit that ran all the way up her thigh.  She makes a stunning entrance as she struts toward him and… TRIPS!  Thankfully, Jake catches her and there are no skinned knees.  OUTCOME: She’s staying.

This 29-year old is a teacher with a cool mom who sent her tons of clothes to wear on the show.  This smart cookie is working on her PhD and wants to become a professor.  She might get her degree in creative arts because not only did she show up with this cool spinner for Jake’s “broken picker,” but she also came equipped with a sexy flight attendant outfit.  (How did she smuggle that in?)  Her antics got her noticed although some of the ladies took pleasure in putting her down.  Personally, I like her!  She’s got gumption!  OUTCOME:  She’s staying.

This spokesmodel donned one of her pageant-ish dresses to meet Jake.  You know.. the sequined, backless kind.  There wasn’t really much about her that seemed genuine, or at least not that they aired.   She’s not the one for Jake.  OUTCOME:  Sent packing.

I’m not sure what the casting director was thinking with this pick.  In a million years, I would never pair her up with Jake.  You’ll never guess what she does to hook Jake into a private conversation later in the evening?  She tells him something in Cambodian and tells him that he’ll have to ask her later what it means.  Circa: Outside on the patio during their one-on-one time… She tells him to hold her hands because this is “very serious.”  She repeats this line in Cambodian and asks him if he wants to know what it means.  Of course, he took the bait.  She told him, “You can land your plane on my landing strip anytime!”  Oh NO!  She did not say that on national television!  As a woman, I cringed!  Yulck!  OUTCOME: Sent packing.

This restaurant manager from San Diego came prepared with jelly-bean consolation prizes for the losing women.  She’s ultra competitive and liked to play airplane with Jake.  There is absolutely NOTHING that I can say positive about this one.  OUTCOME:  She’s staying.

Corrie flew in under the radar, but didn’t escape Jake’s attention.  She seemed to maintain the morals that Jake does.  They seem compatible on paper, but I didn’t observe too much chemistry.  OUTCOME:  She’s staying.

My babysitters never looked like Elizabeth!  She’s athletic, pretty earthy, and all around a good potential match for Jake.  She even takes him out front for a game of catch which resulted in the girls playing a short football scrimmage in gowns and bare feet.  However, I could not stop staring at her chest!  She really needs to get a re-do on her breast enlargement.  They are not the right size and don’t look good on her body!  OUTCOME:  She’s staying.

Elizabeth: Eye-Eye, Captain!

This Elizabeth is a captain (pilot) in the US Air National Guard.  Wow!  Cool!  You’d think that this would be right up Jake’s alley.  Curiously enough, the commonality of being pilots weren’t enough to earn her a rose.  OUTCOME:  Sent packing (and, I’m bummed… I liked her!). 

Ella: My Favorite Out The Gate

I really liked this hair dresser who is also a boxer.  She just came across as being so genuine and really there to meet Jake.  Her son, Ethan, sent his airplane with Ella to give to Jake for good luck.  There’s just something about this one that I really liked!  OUTCOME:  She’s staying.

Emily: Just a model.

The only thing that I even remember about her is that she’s a model.  Hmmm…. OUTCOME:  Sent packing.

Gia: I love looking at my tushie...

Well, here we  go with yet ANOTHER model.  (sigh)  Gia is a swimsuit model who apparently hasn’t had good luck in her relationships.  She is stunningly gorgeous, however I formed a bad taste in my mouth when I watched her repeatedly look at her butt in the mirror before she met Jake.  OK, yes.. we know you have a rockin’ bod.  Enough!  OUTCOME:  She’s staying.

Jessie: The Corny-One-Liner-Lady

She’s gorgeous and she can catch a football, but what is up with the line about “registering those guns” while feeling Jake’s biceps?  Eek!  Her good touchdown catches landed her a rose.  OUTCOME:  She’s staying.

Kathyrn: A Cheery Flight Attendant

Kathryn wears an engagement ring on her wedding finger.  I don’t understand what that was all about, but she offered the ring up to Jake.  I guess he took the bait.  OUTCOME:  She’s staying. 

Kimberly: The One Who Got Away!

She’s a NBA dancer and as cute as a button.  Genuine, sweet, nice family… How did Jake miss this one?  She was one of my favorites on the night and I think he made a boo-boo on this one.  I would have traded Rozlyn for Kimberly.  OUTCOME:  Sent packing.  (boo!)

Kirsten: She wants to slap Jillian.

I can’t imagine why anybody would proclaim on national television that she wanted to slap Jillian for not picking Jake.  But, here she is.  Little did she know that Jillian and Ed were on their way.  I guess Jake must have picked up on her domestic violence tendencies.  OUTCOME:  Sent packing.

Michelle: The Crazy From The O.C.

Now this one should be my “home girl” because she’s from my neck of the woods.  However, she was just emotionally falling apart and all over the place.  Another bachelorette made the best comment when she said, “… and, she’s only been here an hour!”  Yeah!  What is up with that?  Ed & Jillian warned Jake about her, but he didn’t heed their advice.  OUTCOME: She’s staying. (big boo boo, Jake.)

Rozlyn: This is my opportunity for stardom!

You know who would be the perfect guy for Rozlyn?  Wes from last season’s The Bachelorette !  The claim for fame is written all over her face.  Her intro video was of her doing a modeling shoot.  Her bazooms were just overflowing over her dress.  She even admitted that she relies on her looks too much.  Boring, shallow and not the right one.  My prediction is that she’s the cheater who hooked up with the producer.  Jake can’t say “no” to a pretty face.  OUTCOME:  She’s staying.

Sheila: Smart, Classy Pilot!

This is another “what was Jake thinking” moments.  How he didn’t pick her is beyond me.  This is the 3rd pilot that he sent packing.  Why is that?  Hmmm… Even Jillian & Ed liked her.  Sheila, I thought you were great!  OUTCOME:  Sent packing.

Stephanie: She'll teach you to dance.

This girl has great shoes!  They perfectly matched her dress and they had the most fantastic ribbons on them.  That’s all I remember about Stephanie.  At least Jake got a dance lesson.  OUTCOME:  Sent packing.

Tenley: Toyko's Ariel Dances On The Beach, Cries, Kisses Jake, and Speaks Openly About Her Virginity

This one is more than likely going to make it to the end.  She seems to be right up Jake’s alley.  She does this ridiculous dance number on the beach in the sand which I totally didn’t get.  Then, she goes on to share about her divorce from her cheating ex-husband whom she lost her virginity to.  Later, she gives Jake the “10 reasons why” list for picking her.  She seals it all with asking for a kiss and secures herself the First Impression Rose.  Well, we know she isn’t the one who dallied with the producer!  OUTCOME:  She’s staying.

Tiana: 31 & Fit

She’s a medical technician who is fit.  Well, I don’t exactly think that 31 is old and she almost made it sound like she was so.  Maybe it’s all the 23 & 25-year olds in the competition.  Overall, I thought she seemed like a classy lady.  She wasn’t Jake’s cup of tea.  OUTCOME:  Sent packing.

Valisha: Dishes the dirt!

She must really relate to Scarlett O’Hara because the land is all that matters.  She brought Texas soil to bring to Jake because it is their “common ground.”  Clever enough, but she’s playing the Texas card.  OUTCOME:  She’s staying.

Vienna: She has "Mommy & Me" Playdates with her dog

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