Monday, Jun 8, 2009

The Bachelorette: “Loserish Blob of Blue Nothingness” He Cried!

Jillian takes the remaining men to her home town Vancouver, British Columbia for three dates: a 1-on-1, a group date and a 2-on-1 date.   For those who haven’t visited Vancouver, it’s really a gorgeous city and it will be hosting the 2010 Winter Olympics.  

The hottie that she picked for her 1-on-1 date is Kipton from Encintas, California. 

They met by the water and went for kayak rides in the bay and they raced to the bridge.   They went shopping for groceries at local markets and went back to her place to cook dinner.   As they cook dinner, there is much kissing and a ton o’ romance.  Kiptyn is a first class babe-o-licious AND any woman would just die to turn up the heat in the kitchen with Kiptyn.  It could almost be a show of its own:  In the Kitchen With Kiptyn.  *snicker*    After dinner, they sit in the living room and she has body language galore going on.  She’s flipping her hair, gazing into his eyes and dangling on his every word!  He’s giving her a speech about going after things and the entire time she’s sending him subliminal messages saying, “go after me… take me!” 

The funniest part of their date is when they are outside for dessert.  As they snuggle on this over-sized lounge chair, she grabs the rose.  He asks, “What’s that?”  Are you freaking kidding me!?!  DUH!   She answers, “It’s a rose.”  Well, I think we’ve more than established that by now!

After she says goodbye at her door, she does the happy dance!  She’s a smitten kitten!

 Next on the agenda was a group date in which they go Curling, an internationally recognized Olympic sport.  It’s basically throwing a large stone down an alley of ice and trying to hit a bulls-eye.   There’s sweeping the ice by your teammates to get the stone to reach the proper destination.  She split the guys up into two teams, the red team and the blue team.  Despite Michael’s (the break dancer) wish of escaping with Jillian for a “cup of hot chocolate and no-more-curling,” the red team, consisting of Jesse, David, Robby, Jake and Juan, are the winners of the contest and get the continued group date, the highlights thereof:

• Jesse, our very tall wine maker,  is named MVP for his awesome game-winning Curling throw.  His 1-on-1 time proves to be fruitful when he receives the date rose, thereby saving him from elimination.
• A boat dinner cruise on the historic ship the Pacific Yellowfin in which they get a huge bowl of fresh-cooked crabs dumped on their table for dining.
• A private tour on the bridge of the ship with Jake brings about an intimate conversation about Jake’s constant problem of being labeled “perfect.”  *this is where I start to gag*  What’s going on here?  I love Jake.  Now, 5 minutes of “perfect talk” have nearly ruined him for me, and maybe Jillian.
• Some cozy time with egotistical David just makes me want to jump into the screen and strangle the guy. He’s so used to the women fawning all over him that he doesn’t stop for a second to really take an introspective look at himself.  There has to be more to a guy than good looks and a strong confidence.  There has to be a man with a soul that you can love.  David’s on-going conversation about Jillian’s ass, Jillian’s ass in spandex, him watching Jillian’s ass by walking behind her, and her bra strap showing was waaaaay to much for me to absorb.  Just shut the f*$! up!   She turns a cheek to his impending kiss and turns him down flat for an on-the-mouth-kiss.  GOOD GIRL!  He takes this as a sign that she is challenging him to fight harder for her.  WHAT?  Ultimately, she feels disrespected and he WILL be out the door at elimination time!

The show ends with the elimination night cocktail party with the looming rose ceremony.  Although there was less drama, there was more controversy.    The down and dirty is:

• Reid and Jillian kiss and he’s secured himself a rose.
• Wes blinds Jillian with more of his acting
• Jake has a heart-to-heart with Jillian about their “perfect” conversation on the group date.  He shares with her how much he is really into her and is here for her.
• Tanner P. actually completely lets go of the foot fetish and decides to MAN-UP and tell Jillian of the conversation he overheard about Wes having a girlfriend back home.  He doesn’t, however, name names.
• Jillian abruptly ends the cocktail party.   When she returns with the host, they try to fish out the liar. 
• Despite the peer pressure, not a one of them “mans up” to tell the truth about the ulterior motive for coming on the show… WES!
• The men that are there to find love get pissed, especially Jake and Robby.
• Jillian returns and has to rely on her gut instincts on the elimination.

So, the rose ceremony comes along and these are the guys who are staying:

Wes… Cheater-Cheater Pumpkin Eater Wanna Be Country Star

Michael, The Break-Dance Instructor From NY who hugs Jillian a lot

Now for the guys that were cut tonight:

David: The Full-Of-Himself Bully who doesn't know that "unsecure" is not the right word... it's "insecure"!

 By the way, I predicted 2 of the 3 that went home this week!  Yeah, me!  Next week… my guess is Tanner, Wes and Robby.

Stay tuned… 

Jake took last week’s poll again with 46% of the votes.  I predict a Kipton surge after tonight’s episode. 

It’s time for you to vote for “Who You Like The Most.”  Now, that can be based on looks only or looks plus personality!

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