Tuesday, May 26, 2009

The Bachelorette: More Streaking Than Mascara in the Pool

Reality TV/Monday Night ABC Fans… now that Dancing With The Stars has come to an end, our summer is scheduled to keep us busy with The Bachelorette in its time slot.   ABC has chosen this season’s bachelorette, Jillian Harris, from last season’s The Bachelor with Two-Timer Jason.  If you are a regular reader of my blog, you may remember that Jillian Harris was NOT my pick for The Bachelorette.    I really liked Stephanie:

But, those ABC Exec’s and casting folks preferred Jillian.  I just wasn’t a fan.  Because they chose Jillian (aka The Hot Dog Girl), I told myself that, for the first season EVER, I wouldn’t watch The Bachelorette.  Unfortunately… there is nothing more interesting to me that’s airing on the tube on Monday Nights since House is also in re-runs.  And, let’s face it… I’m a total cop-out.  Of course I am going to watch it… I just CANNOT resist.

So, now it’s about learning to like Jillian and cheer for her happiness.  There’s an upside to this… SUPER HOT GUYS!  And, this season is filled with them.  The surprising thing is how much they freak out over Jillian being so “hot!”  That wouldn’be be how I would describe her.  I think she’s cute, spunky, smart and has a bangin’ body… but, “hot?”  Not so sure I agree.  This makes me smile, however, because maybe that means that men are really looking for gals with great personalities.  There’s hope yet for us all!

So, here’s the new bachelorette (if you don’t know her already), Jillian Harris:

Last week, she had 30 men to choose from.  I think she did a pretty great job with picking some of the “better ones.”  The week, the viewers get to learn a little bit more about these guys.  Going into tonight’s episode, I already had my favorites:

Maybe if I was 26 again, I could be the Bachelorette.  I want these hot guys pining over me!  AAAHHH!

So, tonight’s episode got me thinking some thoughts about a few others:

If this guy is truly on this show, without the help of his agent or in hopes of using this show as a platform to gain popularity, then I am certainly going to win the lottery and fly off to Greece!   You’d be a fool not to see it!  The previews for next week show him serenading her with his guitar singing one of his original songs.  BLAH!  He’s totally hot, but I can’t respect the guy.  Maybe I’ll change my mind!?!

Last week, we met Sasha’s family, including his mother.  I like his family!  He seems ultra cool and I want to party with his family!  I hope that we get more time with Sasha.  Although, Tanner (the guy with the foot fetish says he’s got ugly, hairy feet… oh, no… no… no!).

O.K., maybe not panties, but your speedos.  He’ll bargain them right off of you on the beach and streak down to the water.  He gets no points for originality because Jillian suggested it.  However, he does get a couple of brownie points for humoring her by doing it.  Now, at least he had something covering his “Mr. Happy.”  Brian, another bachelor stripped down naked and jumped in the pool in front of everyone.  Of course, he blames his “shrinkage” (comparable to a light switch) on the weather, etc. but, we all know that ain’t so!  (hee hee).  He actually thinks that he got voted off because of the size of his member.  Well, Mike’s sighing a breath of relief that the speedos gave him more of a door handle than a light switch!

Here’s an example of a perfectly handsome general contractor (although he works with his mom the architect and that could be an issue!) who’s just messing up all the way around.  The guys voted him as the one they wanted off the show.  They feel he’s not honoring “The Man Code” by being too artistic, not athletic enough, and faking his tequilla shot.  Well, it’s really David more than anybody who’s after him.  But, let’s face it… there’s always one guy that is more in touch with his inner “renaissance man,” and this is him.   David and the guys were bagging on him for reading women poetry and expressing artistic love.  I only have one thing to say in defense of Juan, at least HE IS MAN ENOUGH to admit it.  There is NO WAY IN HELL that none of the other guys have never written a love letter or poem to a woman (or read her one).  Juan, you may not make it until the end, but I give you kudos for being okay enough with yourself to be yourself.  You may be a bit of a cornball, but at least you’re trying.  Don’t let those mean boys get you down!

Oh, Ed! Ed... Ed... Ed...

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