Happy Birthday, My Babies! 

12 years ago, I got on the scale at the doctor’s office.  I was nearly 38 weeks pregnant and all of the ultrasound technicians told me you were each approximately 5 1/2 pounds a piece.  I hadn’t seen my feet in months and many claimed that an elephant had sexier legs than I did.  That’s right, you could not visibly see any of my joints.  The two of you were just so comfy in HOTEL MOM that you cut off any decent circulation that my legs once enjoyed.

I asked the doc how much the scale read as I couldn’t read it if my life depended on it.  199 pounds.  Oh HECK NO!  There was absolutely NO FREAKING WAY hitting the dreaded 2-0-0!  You were coming out today, no “if’s, and’s or but’s about it!”   Everybody was either out of town or at work, so I drove myself from the doctor’s office to the hospital.  How I managed to reach the pedals of my TransAm I will never know!  As soon as we were settled in our room, I looked forward to meeting you two little terrors who were waging a war in my belly.  I mean, ENOUGH is ENOUGH of that constant wrestling going on in there.  If you want to fight that badly… you can just come out of there and do it outside of my body!  I’ll give you something to fight about…

You know, I had been having contractions already for over 4 months, so they were certainly nothing shocking in the hospital.  I just couldn’t wait for those great drugs that I heard about so that I wouldn’t feel them anymore.  But, OH-NO… you two just decided that I deserved MANY MANY MANY hours filled with cramping and labor before I was dilated enough to get my happy medicine.  I remember, about 8 hours into it, I just wanted them to let me just go into the closet and give birth to my “litter.”  I thought that sounded easier than calling for a nurse every time that I had to roll over.  Yes, my little angels, it took two people to move me from one side to the other!

Meanwhile, while Dee Dee was just scootin’ her way on down… poor little Colie Bear was just being kicked so much that you decided you’d had enough.  You flipped and you turned so that you wouldn’t get it in the tummy from your twin any longer.  Well, thanks a lot!  Now we get to have surgery because the doctors didn’t think we could get you out that way.  Plus, your heart wasn’t very happy after all of that arguing and fighting with your sissie.  SEE!  I told you guys that nothing good ever comes of fighting! 

Amidst the drama, this absolutely INSANE neighbor of ours showed up at the hospital.  We hardly knew her and she wouldn’t leave my room.  When your daddy and I finally had the nerve to ask her to leave, she decided that it would be just as easy to call once every hour for an update on my labor.  Then, she sent balloons.  Who was this woman?

But, that night we invited 12 doctors and nurses into the operating room.  I was so afraid and yet so excited.  I just wanted to meet you both so much.  Would you have my dark hair and dark eyes?   My nose?  I told the anesthesiologist that I would love him forever and ever if he got us through safely.  The good news is that he did!  (I sent him a thank you note… always send a thank you note!) 

Daddy decided that it was more interesting to check out the surgery than calm my nerves.  So, as he stood up to examine the surgery he found joy in describing that all of my internal organs were laying on the table beside me.  Oh, LOVELY!  Just what I wanted to hear… so, I start begging the anesthesiologist to help me calm down.  Daddy announced, “I can now officially say that I love you inside and out!”  Very funny!

Before my eyes you appeared and disappeared.  It was like a blur!  I saw some cheeks and little round mouths.  But, where did you go?  I could hear you crying.  Daddy left with you two while I made friends with the rest of the operating staff.  Little did I know that I would suffer complications and be trapped in rooms for HOURS! 

When I finally made it to my room, everybody had met you two little tykes but me!  I wanted to meet you so bad.  I hadn’t slept in nearly 2 days and I just kept telling your daddy… “if I can just keep my eyes open a few minutes longer!”  So, they went to bring you in.  Just as you arrived, I fell asleep… crying… where were you?

When I awoke the next day, I couldn’t wait to meet you.   I had a terrible allergic reaction to the “happy medicine” and my eyes were burning and nearly swollen shut.  But, I just had to see you.  Daddy was there, too.  They rolled in the two carts with you guys in them.  I asked the nurse, “Are you sure that those are mine?  I mean, how do you really know they’re mine?”  I guess it helped that you were the only girl twins born at the time!  But, where was your dark hair and what was with those blue eyes?  Huh?  Were they positive that you were ours?  Yes, you were mine!

Guess what?  You two stopped fighting!  In the hospital and when you came home, you two were always the happiest when you were very close to the other.  Sometimes, one would reach out her arm to touch the other.  You just were so used to cuddling that you didn’t like to be separated at all.

The first year with you was a joy unlike anything I’ve ever known.  I’ve never IN MY LIFE fallen so completely, unconditionally in love with TWO PEOPLE at THE SAME TIME!  It was such an amazing, overwhelming feeling.  You two were in cahoots with one another every step of the way, including forming a secret “twin language” that only the two of you could understand.  Everything was in 2’s and nearly everything took twice as long.  You were beautiful babies and I could hardly go anywhere without being stopped with that completely STUPID question: “Are those twins?”  I mean, are they crazy… how could I have gotten pregnant and delivered another baby so fast?  EEK!

DeeDee and ColieBear, my life without you would be meaningless.  You are my everything and all that I live for and dream for.  You are my joy and my little “pains in the PA-TWO-KAH!”

Love,

Mom

P.S. Just remember that I still have rights to squeeze those tooshies ANY TIME that I want to.  I don’t even have to ask first!  They are mine for the grabbing!  And, yes… that includes your wedding day if I see fit!

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